On the first Thursday of each month, a growing number of people are coming together in the Kansas City area to pray a rosary in front of an “adult” book store. Personally, being part of these monthly rosaries has been a huge source of healing, and a new feeling of adventure. Ironically, I used to spend hours in “adult” book stores looking for the “perfect”pornographic video. Porn and masturbation were some of the only things I felt a sense of risk and adventure with in my life. The intoxicating rush of excitement and adrenaline with porn helped me to escape boredom, loneliness, and stress. After the incredible rush though, I was left with feelings of hypocrisy, emptiness, self-loathing, and an even deeper ache of loneliness.

I had grown up in the Church and knew that all of this was wrong, but at the end of the day, I felt hopeless to stop a pattern of masturbating to pornographic images and fantasies, which had occurred at least 1,000 times before I had even met my wife. I naively thought that the struggles with lust would end after marriage, but as Jason Evert says, marriage is the fulfillment of love, not the fulfillment of lust. My perception of love and marriage had been deeply warped by pornography, and I needed help.

Through God’s grace, I found freedom and accountability through a Christian recovery center with Dr. Doug Weiss. In addition to the counseling and recovery groups, I have been greatly strengthened by the incredible beauty of Pope John Paul II’s Theology of the Body, regular spiritual direction, and the incredible grace of Reconciliation and the Eucharist.

A few years ago, I received an email about the inspiring work that Mark Houck and Damian Wargo were leading with the King’s Men. I remember going to their website and feeling a new rush of adventure, excitement, and adrenaline as I looked at inspiring pictures of the work they were doing to fight pornography. Their boldness to stand in front of “adult” book stores while holding up signs was awesome, and I think I looked at every picture on their site! I remember feeling a similar rush of excitement when I prayed rosaries in front of abortion clinics with pro-life groups.

I began thinking about local places that needed help from brave people. There is one “adult” book store in particular that really bothers me. It is a 100 yards (100 meters) from the entrance of a large community college, where mainly 18-20 year old students are taking classes. A local Catholic high school plays its home basketball games at the community college as well. There is a family restaurant next door to this pornography store, and I have no idea how this “book store” was allowed to open up in an otherwise family-friendly part of town.

My wife and I looked at our schedules and happened to have the first Thursday of each month open. We talked with Mark Houck, our local Archdiocesan Pro-life Office, local Christian leaders who were familiar with zoning laws, and the Archdiocesan attorney to make sure that we could legally pray in front of the store. Permissions were obtained from a city government official, and we started our monthly prayer services on a rainy day on 11/5/09 with four people.

Five people came during the second month including my wife, Beth, who was two weeks away from giving birth, and Msgr. Michael Mullen, who is the pastor of nearby St. Patrick’s Catholic Church. After the event, Msgr. Mullen said that he would spread the word at his parish, and thought it would be a good idea if we prayed a rosary during the event. I thought that the rosary was a great idea, and my devotion to Mary has been a huge part of my healing. By the way, I love Matt Fradd’s saying of Mary taking away the chains of pornography as we take up the chains of the rosary.

We noticed that Thursdays happened to be designated for the Luminous Mysteries, also known as the “mysteries of light.” Pope John Paul II proposed the Luminous Mysteries during the 25th year of his pontificate, in his Apostolic Letter Rosarium Virginis Maria. I am a huge fan of Pope John Paul II, and his Theology of the Body has been a tremendous source of hope and healing for me, and has helped to give me a new vision of love and sexuality. According to Christopher West in The Good News about Sex and Marriage, Pope John Paul II wrote over two thirds of what the Church has ever taught about sex and marriage!

During the most recent event on March 4, 2010, eight of us gathered in front of Cirilla’s “adult” book store on a beautiful and sunny day. It was quite an adventure, and I could feel my heart racing with adrenaline as we set up the signs. Msgr. Mullen led us in the Luminous Mysteries, and one of our brave Archdiocesan seminarians was there as well.

This picture was actually taken by a man who was so inspired when he drove by, that he pulled over, parked his car in a nearby area, and walked over to talk with us. His name was Mitchell, and he and his fiancé have felt a calling to be missionaries in Africa, and he thanked us for our witness. There were a good number of people who honked their horns and waved to us in gratitude as well. I really did not notice any negative reactions to our large signs as cars rushed by on the busy street.

It is amazing to experience the new adventure, risk, and exhilaration of standing up to fight porn. There will always be temptations in my life, but being involved in rosaries like this helps to strengthen and encourage me. If God can take a man that was as isolated and hopeless as I was, and help turn my life around, I know that he can help change the hearts of the people whose cars are in the parking lot of Cirilla’s.

I pray for these people, and who knows, maybe some of them went to our website after seeing the sign, and saw links to powerful sites like WhoDoesItHurt.com, and are reading this article now. Maybe they will be inspired by resources on Theology of the Body and become involved in accountability with other people. All I know is that I will keep fighting to be a man of integrity, and I feel more strength after taking risks like these. Who knows how God will work through each of us to light up the darkness!

In Christ our hope,

Sam Meier

Archdiocese of Kansas City in Kansas

www.LoveIsFaithful.com

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•   |74.197.242.xxx |2010-07-17 20:58:29 anononymous
  Thanks for battling this great evil

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